June 10th

I've POAS for the last 4 mornings. I've been trying to brace myself and ease into a BFN. I've never been an early tester. J agreed that I should do it because we want to do EVERYTHING different this cycle. We're trying to change our luck by doing every single thing differently.

No big surprise that the tests have all been white, white, white. Just what I expected. Until today. Today there is a...... shadow. It's not a line. It's barely a shadow, but it's something. I couldn't believe it. Surely my eyes had to be playing tricks onme. I came flying down the stairs in my undies to show J. He could see it too! I wasn't loosing my mind! Then he told me that he fished yesterdays test out of the trash when I wasn't looking and he thought he saw a shadow on that one too! Where was that information?!?

I'm not calling this a positive. It is far too faint. It's a barely visible, possibly imaginary, shadow. Praise God for this glimmer of hope! We have been praying morning, noon, and night for this. I've been telling J all week that June 10th is our lucky day. It's the day of our first date. The day that marked the beginning of our relationship. The day that it all started. The day that changed our lives forever. From the first day we were solidly and wholly committed to each other and we never looked back. I can't think of a better day to see our first "positive" test. If this is real, our lives again will change and hopefully we will never have to look back.