6dp5dt = Happiness!!!!!!

I guess I spoke too soon with my last post. I thought I was feeling calm about the whole process but that all changed when I got into bed last night. I started thinking about what would happen to us if this IVF doesn't work. I've thought of if a million times before but last night the weight of it all seemed like too much. Of course I had an estrogen melt down and a few tears were shed. J and I agreed that if this one doesn't work we will have HUGE decisions to make. Our RE has done everything he can for us. Now it's time to sink or swim.

No surprise that after our conversation I couldn't sleep at all. I was tossing and turning all night. I woke up this morning needing to pee and totally torn about testing. I stayed in bed forever trying to decide what to do and I finally decided that I was better off testing. I thought that if I didn't test I would spend the whole day stressing out and possibly crying about this whole mess.

I told myself about 20 times that it's only 6dp5dt so I won't see anything and then I POAS. I put down the test and brushed my teeth. When I picked it back up there were 2 lines. TWO LINES!!!!!! It had only been a minute and the line was super light, so I thought, okay this is a good start. Then I was shocked when over the next couple of minutes it kept getting darker. I said a quick prayer and went downstairs to find J. I pulled the stick out of my pocket and he looked a little panicked. Then he saw the two beautiful lines and he couldn't stop hugging me.

This is just the ray of hope that we needed. We have a long long way to go before I will believe that this might be real. I just feel so blessed to get this great news today. I'm going to spend the next few days praying my heart out and trying not to POAS again.